.FUNCT	INCREMENT-SCORE,BASE,VAR,INC-RANK=0,CHANGE,DIF
	ZERO?	INC-RANK /?CND1
	INC	'RANK
?CND1:	RANDOM	VAR
	ADD	STACK,BASE >CHANGE
	ADD	BASE,VAR
	SUB	STACK,CHANGE >DIF
	SUB	INT-MAX,DIF >INT-MAX
	SUB	EXT-MAX,INT-MAX
	RANDOM	STACK
	ADD	INT-MAX,STACK >EXT-MAX
	ADD	SCORE,CHANGE >SCORE
	RETURN	SCORE


	.FUNCT	INTDIR-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?BOARD \FALSE
	EQUAL?	P-PRSA-WORD,W?RIDE \FALSE
	IN?	PROTAGONIST,STALLION \?ELS12
	CALL	DO-WALK,P-DIRECTION
	RSTACK	
?ELS12:	IN?	STALLION,HERE \?ELS14
	CALL	DO-FIRST,STR?124
	RSTACK	
?ELS14:	PRINT	THERES-NOTHING
	PRINTR	"to ride!"


	.FUNCT	INTNUM-F
	CALL	ADJ-USED,A?WIFE
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS5
	EQUAL?	HERE,INNER-HAREM \?THN8
	ZERO?	MALE \?ELS5
?THN8:	CALL	PICKING-WIFE
	ZERO?	STACK \?ELS5
	SET	'P-WON,FALSE-VALUE
	PRINT	YOU-CANT-SEE-ANY
	PRINTR	"wife here!"
?ELS5:	CALL	ADJ-USED,A?HUSBAND
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS11
	EQUAL?	HERE,INNER-HAREM \?THN14
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS11
?THN14:	CALL	PICKING-WIFE
	ZERO?	STACK \?ELS11
	SET	'P-WON,FALSE-VALUE
	PRINT	YOU-CANT-SEE-ANY
	PRINTR	"husband here!"
?ELS11:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?ANSWER-KLUDGE \?ELS17
	CALL	PERFORM,V?USE-QUOTES,INTNUM
	RTRUE	
?ELS17:	EQUAL?	P-NUMBER,CHOICE-NUMBER \?ELS19
	IN?	SULTANS-WIFE,HERE \?ELS19
	EQUAL?	PRSO,INTNUM \?ELS26
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,SULTANS-WIFE,PRSI
	RTRUE	
?ELS26:	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PRSO,SULTANS-WIFE
	RTRUE	
?ELS19:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PICK,V?ASK-NO-ONE-FOR \?ELS34
	IN?	HAREM-GUARD,HERE /?THN31
?ELS34:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?ASK-FOR \?ELS30
	EQUAL?	PRSO,HAREM-GUARD \?ELS30
?THN31:	CALL	PICK-WIFE,INTNUM
	RSTACK	
?ELS30:	EQUAL?	HERE,VIZICOMM-BOOTH \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SET \FALSE
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,VIZICOMM
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	PICKING-WIFE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PICK,V?ASK-NO-ONE-FOR \?ELS5
	IN?	HAREM-GUARD,HERE /TRUE
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?ASK-FOR \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSO,HAREM-GUARD \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	EACH-OTHER-F
	EQUAL?	PRSI,EACH-OTHER \?ELS5
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PRSO,PRSO
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	CALL	NOUN-USED,W?ITSELF,EACH-OTHER
	ZERO?	STACK \FALSE
	SET	'P-WON,FALSE-VALUE
	CALL	ADJ-USED,A?EACH
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS10
	CALL	CANT-USE,A?EACH,TRUE-VALUE
	RTRUE	
?ELS10:	CALL	CANT-USE,W?OTHER,TRUE-VALUE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	MAN-WOMAN-F,PERSON
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?FOLLOW \?ELS5
	EQUAL?	FOLLOW-FLAG,4 \?ELS10
	PRINT	DONT-WANT-TO
	RTRUE	
?ELS10:	EQUAL?	FOLLOW-FLAG,5 \?ELS12
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?NORTH
	RSTACK	
?ELS12:	EQUAL?	FOLLOW-FLAG,6 \?ELS14
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?EAST
	RSTACK	
?ELS14:	CALL	V-WALK-AROUND
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	GET	P-NAMW,0
	EQUAL?	STACK,W?MAN \?ELS18
	EQUAL?	PRSO,MAN-WOMAN \?ELS18
	CALL	FIND-MAN >PERSON
	ZERO?	PERSON /?ELS25
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PERSON,PRSI
	RTRUE	
?ELS25:	CALL	CANT-SEE,MAN-WOMAN
	RSTACK	
?ELS18:	GET	P-NAMW,0
	EQUAL?	STACK,W?WOMAN \?ELS29
	EQUAL?	PRSO,MAN-WOMAN \?ELS29
	CALL	FIND-WOMAN >PERSON
	ZERO?	PERSON /?ELS36
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PERSON,PRSI
	RTRUE	
?ELS36:	CALL	CANT-SEE,MAN-WOMAN
	RSTACK	
?ELS29:	GET	P-NAMW,1
	EQUAL?	STACK,W?MAN \?ELS40
	EQUAL?	PRSI,MAN-WOMAN \?ELS40
	CALL	FIND-MAN >PERSON
	ZERO?	PERSON /?ELS47
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PRSO,PERSON
	RTRUE	
?ELS47:	CALL	CANT-SEE,MAN-WOMAN
	RSTACK	
?ELS40:	GET	P-NAMW,1
	EQUAL?	STACK,W?WOMAN \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSI,MAN-WOMAN \FALSE
	CALL	FIND-WOMAN >PERSON
	ZERO?	PERSON /?ELS58
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PRSO,PERSON
	RTRUE	
?ELS58:	CALL	CANT-SEE,MAN-WOMAN
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	FIND-MAN
	PUTP	MAN-WOMAN,P?SDESC,STR?125
	IN?	SALESMAN,HERE \?ELS5
	RETURN	SALESMAN
?ELS5:	IN?	MAD-SCIENTIST,HERE \?ELS7
	RETURN	MAD-SCIENTIST
?ELS7:	IN?	MITRE,HERE \?ELS9
	RETURN	MITRE
?ELS9:	IN?	PROPRIETOR,HERE \?ELS11
	RETURN	PROPRIETOR
?ELS11:	IN?	THORBAST,HERE \?ELS13
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS13
	RETURN	THORBAST
?ELS13:	IN?	YOUNG-WOMAN,HERE \?ELS17
	ZERO?	MALE \?ELS17
	RETURN	YOUNG-WOMAN
?ELS17:	IN?	SULTAN,HERE \?ELS21
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS21
	RETURN	SULTAN
?ELS21:	IN?	SULTANS-WIFE,HERE \?ELS25
	ZERO?	MALE \?ELS25
	RETURN	SULTANS-WIFE
?ELS25:	CALL	VISIBLE?,SIDEKICK
	ZERO?	STACK /FALSE
	ZERO?	MALE /FALSE
	RETURN	SIDEKICK


	.FUNCT	FIND-WOMAN
	PUTP	MAN-WOMAN,P?SDESC,STR?126
	IN?	THORBAST,HERE \?ELS5
	ZERO?	MALE \?ELS5
	RETURN	THORBAST
?ELS5:	IN?	YOUNG-WOMAN,HERE \?ELS9
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS9
	RETURN	YOUNG-WOMAN
?ELS9:	IN?	THETA,HERE \?ELS13
	FSET?	THETA,MUNGBIT /?ELS13
	RETURN	THETA
?ELS13:	IN?	LGOP,HERE \?ELS17
	RETURN	LGOP
?ELS17:	IN?	SULTAN,HERE \?ELS19
	ZERO?	MALE \?ELS19
	RETURN	SULTAN
?ELS19:	IN?	SULTANS-WIFE,HERE \?ELS23
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS23
	RETURN	SULTANS-WIFE
?ELS23:	CALL	VISIBLE?,SIDEKICK
	ZERO?	STACK /FALSE
	ZERO?	MALE \FALSE
	RETURN	SIDEKICK


	.FUNCT	NOT-HERE-OBJECT-F,TBL,PRSO?=1,OBJ,X=0
	EQUAL?	PRSO,NOT-HERE-OBJECT \?ELS3
	EQUAL?	PRSI,NOT-HERE-OBJECT \?ELS3
	PRINTR	"Those things aren't here!"
?ELS3:	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?BODY \?ELS7
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?MY,FALSE-VALUE \?ELS7
	EQUAL?	PRSO,NOT-HERE-OBJECT \?ELS12
	SET	'PRSO,ME
	RFALSE	
?ELS12:	SET	'PRSI,ME
	RFALSE	
?ELS7:	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?HAND,W?HANDS \?ELS16
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?MITRE,W?KING'S \?ELS16
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TAKE,V?SHAKE \?ELS16
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SHAKE-WITH,HANDS,MITRE
	RTRUE	
?ELS16:	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?HANDS,W?HAND,W?PALM /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?FINGER,W?EYE,W?EYES /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?HEAD,W?EARS,W?EAR /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?LIP,W?LIPS,W?MOUTH /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?KNEECAP,W?KNEE,W?KNEES /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?NOSE,W?NOSTRIL,W?BALLS /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?PENIS,W?COCK,W?ASS /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?TITS,W?BREAST,W?BOSOM /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?CUNT,W?VAGINA,W?PUSSY /?THN23
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?TIT,W?BODY \?ELS20
?THN23:	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?TRENT,W?TIFFAN,W?TIFF'S /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?GODDESSES,W?SHAPE,W?COUCHMATE /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?THORBAST,W?ASSASSIN,W?SALESMAN /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?SCIENTIST,W?GORILLA,W?MONKEY /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?KING'S,W?MITRE,W?SULTAN /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?PROPRIETOR,W?OWNER,W?GUARD /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?PRINCE,W?DAUGHTER,W?THETA /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?BARTENDER,W?WIFE'S,W?HUSBAND /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?ELYSIA,W?ELYSIUM,W?WOMAN /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?ROBOT,W?BABY'S /?THN25
	EQUAL?	P-XADJN,W?MAN'S,W?HIS,W?HER \?ELS20
?THN25:	PRINTR	"[Sorry. Given limited space, we can't handle everything. Therefore, you can only refer to characters in the story, not individual body parts. For example, you can KISS IRWIN but you can't KISS IRWIN'S ELBOW.]"
?ELS20:	EQUAL?	PRSO,NOT-HERE-OBJECT \?ELS28
	SET	'TBL,P-PRSO
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS28:	SET	'TBL,P-PRSI
	SET	'PRSO?,FALSE-VALUE
?CND1:	ZERO?	PRSO? /?ELS33
	CALL	PRSO-MOBY-VERB?
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS33
	SET	'X,TRUE-VALUE
	JUMP	?CND31
?ELS33:	ZERO?	PRSO? \?CND31
	CALL	PRSI-MOBY-VERB?
	ZERO?	STACK /?CND31
	SET	'X,TRUE-VALUE
?CND31:	ZERO?	X /?ELS42
	CALL	FIND-NOT-HERE,TBL,PRSO? >OBJ
	ZERO?	OBJ /FALSE
	EQUAL?	OBJ,NOT-HERE-OBJECT \TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?FOLLOW,V?WALK-TO \?ELS54
	CALL	V-WALK-AROUND
	JUMP	?CND40
?ELS54:	PRINTI	"["
	PRINT	YOULL-HAVE-TO
	PRINTI	"be more specific.]"
	CRLF	
	JUMP	?CND40
?ELS42:	EQUAL?	WINNER,PROTAGONIST \?ELS61
	PRINTI	"You"
	JUMP	?CND59
?ELS61:	PRINTI	"Looking confused,"
	CALL	TPRINT,WINNER
	PRINTI	" says, ""I"
?CND59:	PRINTI	" can't "
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?ODOR,W?SMELL,W?SCENT \?ELS66
	PRINTI	"smell"
	JUMP	?CND64
?ELS66:	PRINTI	"see"
?CND64:	CALL	NAME?,P-XNAM
	ZERO?	STACK /?THN72
	EQUAL?	P-XNAM,W?FORD \?CND69
?THN72:	PRINTI	" any"
?CND69:	CALL	NOT-HERE-PRINT,PRSO?
	PRINTI	" here!"
	EQUAL?	WINNER,PROTAGONIST /?CND74
	PRINTI	""""
?CND74:	CRLF	
?CND40:	CALL	STOP
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	PRSO-MOBY-VERB?
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?WHAT,V?WHERE /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?WAIT-FOR,V?WALK-TO,V?MAKE /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?BUY,V?CALL,V?SAY /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?FIND,V?FOLLOW,V?PHONE /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?USE-QUOTES,V?ANSWER-KLUDGE \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	PRSI-MOBY-VERB?
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?ASK-ABOUT,V?ASK-FOR,V?TELL-ABOUT \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	FIND-NOT-HERE,TBL,PRSO?,M-F,OBJ
	CALL	MOBY-FIND,TBL >M-F
	EQUAL?	1,M-F \?ELS5
	ZERO?	PRSO? /?ELS8
	SET	'PRSO,P-MOBY-FOUND
	CALL	THIS-IS-IT,PRSO
	RFALSE	
?ELS8:	SET	'PRSI,P-MOBY-FOUND
	RFALSE	
?ELS5:	LESS?	1,M-F \?ELS13
	GET	TBL,1 >OBJ
	GETP	OBJ,P?GENERIC
	CALL	STACK >OBJ
	ZERO?	OBJ /?ELS13
	EQUAL?	OBJ,NOT-HERE-OBJECT /TRUE
	ZERO?	PRSO? /?ELS20
	SET	'PRSO,OBJ
	CALL	THIS-IS-IT,PRSO
	RFALSE	
?ELS20:	SET	'PRSI,OBJ
	RFALSE	
?ELS13:	RETURN	NOT-HERE-OBJECT


	.FUNCT	NOT-HERE-PRINT,PRSO?,?TMP1
	ZERO?	P-OFLAG /?ELS5
	ZERO?	P-XADJ /?CND7
	PRINTI	" "
	PRINTB	P-XADJN
?CND7:	ZERO?	P-XNAM /FALSE
	PRINTI	" "
	PRINTB	P-XNAM
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	ZERO?	PRSO? /?ELS18
	GET	P-ITBL,P-NC1 >?TMP1
	GET	P-ITBL,P-NC1L
	CALL	BUFFER-PRINT,?TMP1,STACK,FALSE-VALUE
	RSTACK	
?ELS18:	GET	P-ITBL,P-NC2 >?TMP1
	GET	P-ITBL,P-NC2L
	CALL	BUFFER-PRINT,?TMP1,STACK,FALSE-VALUE
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	LOVE-F,LOVER
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?MAKE \FALSE
	CALL	FIND-IN,HERE,ACTORBIT,STR?80 >LOVER
	ZERO?	LOVER /?ELS10
	CALL	PERFORM,V?FUCK,LOVER
	RTRUE	
?ELS10:	PRINTR	"Alone? How odd."


	.FUNCT	GLOBAL-SLEEP-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TAKE,V?WALK-TO \?ELS5
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SLEEP
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT-TO \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSI,GLOBAL-SLEEP \FALSE
	PRINTR	"You're not a hypnotist."


	.FUNCT	GROUND-F
	EQUAL?	HERE,IN-SPACE \?ELS3
	CALL	CANT-SEE,GROUND
	RTRUE	
?ELS3:	FSET?	HERE,INDOORSBIT /?THN6
	LOC	PROTAGONIST
	EQUAL?	STACK,BARGE \?ELS5
?THN6:	PUTP	GROUND,P?SDESC,STR?128
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS5:	PUTP	GROUND,P?SDESC,STR?127
?CND1:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EXAMINE \?ELS14
	EQUAL?	HERE,SPAWNING-GROUND \?ELS19
	PRINT	OOZY-WITH-SLIME
	CRLF	
	RTRUE	
?ELS19:	CALL	GLOBAL-IN?,HOLE,HERE
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS21
	CALL	HOLE-INVISIBLE
	ZERO?	STACK \?ELS21
	PRINTI	"You notice"
	CALL	ARPRINT,HOLE
	RSTACK	
?ELS21:	EQUAL?	HERE,CELL \?ELS25
	PRINTR	"Soft. Cushiony."
?ELS25:	EQUAL?	HERE,OTHER-CELL \?ELS27
	PRINTR	"Rock-hard."
?ELS27:	EQUAL?	HERE,HOLD \?ELS29
	EQUAL?	SIDEKICK-EXPLODED,1 \?ELS29
	CALL	SPLATTERED-DESC
	CRLF	
	RTRUE	
?ELS29:	CALL	IN-CATACOMBS
	ZERO?	STACK /FALSE
	PRINT	CATACOMBS-WATER-DESC
	CRLF	
	RTRUE	
?ELS14:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TOUCH \?ELS35
	EQUAL?	HERE,CELL,OTHER-CELL \?ELS35
	CALL	PERFORM,V?EXAMINE,GROUND
	RTRUE	
?ELS35:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLIMB,V?CLIMB-ON,V?CLIMB-UP /?THN40
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?BOARD \?ELS39
?THN40:	CALL	WASTES
	RSTACK	
?ELS39:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LOOK-UNDER \?ELS43
	CALL	IMPOSSIBLES
	RSTACK	
?ELS43:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LEAVE \?ELS45
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?UP
	RSTACK	
?ELS45:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?STAND-ON,V?LEAP \FALSE
	EQUAL?	HERE,ROOF \FALSE
	CALL	PERFORM,V?LEAP,ROOMS
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	CEILING-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EXAMINE \?ELS5
	EQUAL?	HERE,HOLD \?ELS10
	EQUAL?	SIDEKICK-EXPLODED,1 \?ELS10
	CALL	SPLATTERED-DESC
	CRLF	
	RTRUE	
?ELS10:	EQUAL?	HERE,CELL \?ELS14
	ZERO?	HOLE-OPEN /?ELS14
	PRINTR	"There's a hole in the ceiling."
?ELS14:	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM \FALSE
	FSET?	BEDROOM,MUNGBIT \FALSE
	PRINTR	"Most of the ceiling is now gone."
?ELS5:	FSET?	HERE,INDOORSBIT /?ELS22
	CALL	CANT-SEE,CEILING
	RSTACK	
?ELS22:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?ENTER \?ELS24
	EQUAL?	HERE,CELL \?ELS24
	ZERO?	HOLE-OPEN /?ELS24
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?UP
	RSTACK	
?ELS24:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LOOK-UNDER \FALSE
	CALL	PERFORM,V?LOOK
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	ODOR-F
	EQUAL?	HERE,IN-SPACE \?ELS5
	IN?	THORBAST,HERE /?ELS5
	PRINT	CANT-SMELL
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	HERE,MENS-ROOM,LADIES-ROOM \?ELS9
	CALL	RUNNING?,I-URGE
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS9
	PRINT	CANT-SMELL
	RTRUE	
?ELS9:	EQUAL?	HERE,PLAZA \?ELS13
	LESS?	PLAZA-COUNTER,9 \?ELS13
	PRINT	CANT-SMELL
	RTRUE	
?ELS13:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SMELL /?THN18
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EXAMINE \FALSE
	EQUAL?	P-PRSA-WORD,W?DESCRIBE \FALSE
?THN18:	GETP	HERE,P?ODOR
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS26
	FSET?	HERE,SMELLEDBIT \?ELS31
	PRINTI	"There is a strong odor of "
	GETP	HERE,P?ODOR
	PRINT	STACK
	PRINTR	" in the air."
?ELS31:	FSET	HERE,SMELLEDBIT
	CALL	SCRATCH-N-SNIFF
	GETP	HERE,P?ACTION
	CALL	STACK,M-SMELL
	CRLF	
	RTRUE	
?ELS26:	EQUAL?	HERE,INNER-HAREM \?ELS35
	SET	'HERE,HAREM
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SMELL,ODOR
	SET	'HERE,INNER-HAREM
	RTRUE	
?ELS35:	EQUAL?	HERE,GARDEN \?ELS37
	CALL	NO-SCRATCH-N-SNIFF,STR?129
	RSTACK	
?ELS37:	CALL	ACCESSIBLE?,CHOCOLATE
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS39
	FSET?	CHOCOLATE,UNTEEDBIT /?ELS39
	PRINTI	"[the "
	CALL	DPRINT,CHOCOLATE
	PRINTI	"]"
	CRLF	
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SMELL,CHOCOLATE
	RTRUE	
?ELS39:	PRINT	CANT-SMELL
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	SCRATCH-N-SNIFF,NUM=0
	PRINTI	"[Scratch 'n' sniff spot number "
	ZERO?	NUM /?ELS3
	PRINTN	NUM
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	GETP	HERE,P?ODOR-NUMBER
	PRINTN	STACK
?CND1:	PRINT	HIT-RETURN
	PRINTI	"continue.]"
	READ	P-INBUF,P-LEXV
	CRLF	
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	NO-SCRATCH-N-SNIFF,STRING
	PRINTI	"[Too bad there's no scratch 'n' sniff for this one, huh?]

Ahhh, the odor of "
	PRINT	STRING
	PRINTR	"!"


	.FUNCT	WATER-F
	EQUAL?	HERE,MINARET,DUNETOP \?ELS5
	CALL	TOUCHING?,WATER
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS5
	CALL	CANT-REACH,WATER
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?BUY,V?DRINK \?ELS9
	PRINTR	"You're not thirsty."
?ELS9:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EXAMINE,V?LOOK-UNDER,V?LOOK-INSIDE \?ELS11
	PRINTR	"The water is dark and murky."
?ELS11:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?MAKE,V?PASS \?ELS13
	CALL	V-PEE
	RSTACK	
?ELS13:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?REACH-IN \?ELS15
	PRINTR	"Your hand is now wet."
?ELS15:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT-ON \?ELS17
	EQUAL?	PRSI,WATER \?ELS17
	CALL	PERFORM,V?PUT,PRSO,WATER
	RTRUE	
?ELS17:	CALL	GLOBAL-IN?,CANAL-OBJECT,HERE
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS21
	EQUAL?	PRSO,WATER \?ELS26
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,CANAL-OBJECT,PRSI
	RTRUE	
?ELS26:	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PRSO,CANAL-OBJECT
	RTRUE	
?ELS21:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT \?ELS30
	EQUAL?	PRSI,WATER \?ELS30
	EQUAL?	PRSO,RAFT \?ELS37
	EQUAL?	HERE,OASIS \?ELS37
	PRINTR	"Next you'll be putting yachts in bathtubs!"
?ELS37:	EQUAL?	PRSO,RAFT \?ELS41
	CALL	IN-CATACOMBS
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS41
	CALL	PERFORM,V?DROP,RAFT
	RTRUE	
?ELS41:	CALL	WASTES
	RSTACK	
?ELS30:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?WALK,V?ON \?ELS47
	EQUAL?	HERE,MENS-ROOM,LADIES-ROOM \?ELS47
	CALL	PERFORM,V?FLUSH,TOILET
	RTRUE	
?ELS47:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CRAWL-UNDER,V?ENTER,V?BOARD \FALSE
	CALL	V-SWIM
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	HANDS-F,ACTOR
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?APPLAUD \?ELS5
	SET	'PRSO,FALSE-VALUE
	CALL	V-APPLAUD
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SHAKE \?ELS7
	EQUAL?	HERE,THRONE-ROOM \?ELS12
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SHAKE-WITH,HANDS,MITRE
	RTRUE	
?ELS12:	CALL	FIND-IN,HERE,ACTORBIT,STR?52 >ACTOR
	ZERO?	ACTOR /?ELS14
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SHAKE-WITH,HANDS,ACTOR
	RTRUE	
?ELS14:	PRINTR	"Pleased to meet you."
?ELS7:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?COUNT \?ELS18
	CALL	NOUN-USED,W?FINGER,HANDS
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS21
	PRINTI	"Ten"
	JUMP	?CND19
?ELS21:	PRINTI	"Two"
?CND19:	PRINTR	", as usual."
?ELS18:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLEAN \?ELS25
	PRINTR	"Done."
?ELS25:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TAKE-WITH \?ELS27
	EQUAL?	PRSI,HANDS \?ELS27
	CALL	PERFORM,V?TAKE,PRSO
	RTRUE	
?ELS27:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT-ON \?ELS31
	EQUAL?	PRSI,EYES \?ELS31
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SPUT-ON,EYES,HANDS
	RTRUE	
?ELS31:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT,V?PUT-ON \?ELS35
	EQUAL?	PRSI,EARS \?ELS35
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SPUT-ON,EARS,HANDS
	RTRUE	
?ELS35:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SPUT-ON \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSO,NOSE,EARS,EYES \FALSE
	ZERO?	GONE-APE /?ELS46
	PRINT	DEXTERITY
	RTRUE	
?ELS46:	CALL	ITEMS-CARRIED
	GRTR?	STACK,0 \?ELS49
	PRINT	YOU-CANT
	PRINTI	"do that with "
	PRINTD	HANDS
	PRINTR	"s full!"
?ELS49:	ZERO?	HAND-COVER /?ELS54
	PRINTI	"You're already"
	JUMP	?CND52
?ELS54:	SET	'HAND-COVER,PRSO
	FSET	PRSO,MUNGBIT
	EQUAL?	HAND-COVER,EARS \?ELS60
	PRINT	MUFFLED
	PRINTI	"'re"
	JUMP	?CND52
?ELS60:	PRINTI	"Okay, you're now"
?CND52:	PRINTI	" covering "
	CALL	DPRINT,HAND-COVER
	PRINTI	" with "
	PRINTD	HANDS
	PRINTR	"s."


	.FUNCT	ITEMS-CARRIED,X,CNT=0
	FIRST?	PROTAGONIST >X /?KLU10
?KLU10:	
?PRG1:	ZERO?	X \?ELS5
	RETURN	CNT
?ELS5:	FSET?	X,WORNBIT /?CND3
	EQUAL?	X,COMIC-BOOK /?CND3
	INC	'CNT
?CND3:	NEXT?	X >X /?KLU11
?KLU11:	JUMP	?PRG1


	.FUNCT	HEAD-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT-ON \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSO,SACK,SHEET,BLANKET \FALSE
	SET	'AWAITING-REPLY,2
	CALL	QUEUE,I-REPLY,2
	PRINTR	"Where do you think you are, Traal?"


	.FUNCT	EYES-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLOSE \?ELS5
	ZERO?	GONE-APE /?ELS10
	CALL	WASTES
	RSTACK	
?ELS10:	FSET?	EYES,MUNGBIT \?ELS13
	EQUAL?	EYES,HAND-COVER \?ELS18
	PRINT	HANDS-OVER-EYES
	RTRUE	
?ELS18:	PRINT	SENILITY-STRIKES
	RTRUE	
?ELS13:	FSET	EYES,MUNGBIT
	CALL	EYES-ARE-NOW,STR?130
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?OPEN \FALSE
	FSET?	EYES,MUNGBIT \?ELS29
	EQUAL?	EYES,HAND-COVER \?ELS34
	PRINT	HANDS-OVER-EYES
	RTRUE	
?ELS34:	CALL	SENSE-AGAIN,EYES
	RSTACK	
?ELS29:	PRINTR	"They are open!"


	.FUNCT	EYES-ARE-NOW,STRING
	PRINTI	"Your eyes are now "
	PRINT	STRING
	PRINT	PERIOD-CR
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	OPEN-EYES-AND-REMOVE-HANDS
	FCLEAR	EYES,MUNGBIT
	ZERO?	HAND-COVER /FALSE
	FCLEAR	HAND-COVER,MUNGBIT
	SET	'HAND-COVER,FALSE-VALUE
	RETURN	HAND-COVER


	.FUNCT	EARS-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TAKE \?ELS5
	EQUAL?	P-PRSA-WORD,W?HOLD \?ELS5
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SPUT-ON,EARS,HANDS
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?UNCOVER \FALSE
	FSET?	COTTON-BALLS,WORNBIT \FALSE
	ZERO?	GONE-APE \FALSE
	EQUAL?	EARS,HAND-COVER \?CND12
	SET	'HAND-COVER,FALSE-VALUE
?CND12:	CALL	PERFORM,V?REMOVE,COTTON-BALLS
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	NOSE-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PICK,V?BLOW \?ELS5
	PRINT	YECHH
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TAKE \?ELS7
	EQUAL?	P-PRSA-WORD,W?HOLD \?ELS7
	CALL	PERFORM,V?SPUT-ON,NOSE,HANDS
	RTRUE	
?ELS7:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?UNCOVER \FALSE
	FSET?	CLOTHES-PIN,WORNBIT \FALSE
	ZERO?	GONE-APE \FALSE
	EQUAL?	NOSE,HAND-COVER \?CND14
	SET	'HAND-COVER,FALSE-VALUE
?CND14:	CALL	PERFORM,V?REMOVE,CLOTHES-PIN
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	MOUTH-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLEAN \?ELS5
	FSET?	LIP-BALM,WORNBIT \?ELS5
	CALL	PERFORM,V?REMOVE,LIP-BALM
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EXAMINE \?ELS9
	FSET?	LIP-BALM,WORNBIT \?ELS9
	CALL	ROB,PROTAGONIST,TOILET
	MOVE	LIP-BALM,PROTAGONIST
	CALL	V-INVENTORY
	CALL	ROB,TOILET,PROTAGONIST
	RSTACK	
?ELS9:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT \?ELS13
	EQUAL?	PRSI,MOUTH \?ELS13
	CALL	PERFORM,V?EAT,PRSO
	RTRUE	
?ELS13:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?OPEN \FALSE
	PRINTR	"This fails to catch any flies."


	.FUNCT	NAUGHTY-BITS-F
	CALL	NOUN-USED,W?PUSSY,CUNT
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS5
	CALL	ADJ-USED,A?MY
	ZERO?	STACK \?ELS5
	CALL	VISIBLE?,PAINTING
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS5
	EQUAL?	PRSO,CUNT \?ELS12
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PAINTING,PRSI
	RTRUE	
?ELS12:	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,PRSI,PAINTING
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	PRINTI	"You don't need to refer to "
	PRINTD	COCK
	PRINTI	" to complete "
	PRINT	LGOP-CAPS
	PRINT	PERIOD-CR
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	ME-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TELL \?ELS5
	PRINTI	"Talking to yourself is a sign of impending mental collapse."
	CRLF	
	CALL	STOP
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?RELIEVE \?ELS7
	CALL	V-PEE
	RSTACK	
?ELS7:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT \?ELS9
	EQUAL?	PRSI,ME \?ELS9
	ZERO?	MALE \?ELS9
	ZERO?	NAUGHTY-LEVEL /?ELS9
	CALL	PERFORM,V?FUCK,ME
	RTRUE	
?ELS9:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EAT,V?FUCK,V?TOUCH \?ELS13
	ZERO?	NAUGHTY-LEVEL /?ELS13
	PRINTI	"Encouraging such behavior would endanger the possibility of landing a lucrative Hollywood contract to make a film of "
	PRINT	LGOP-CAPS
	PRINT	PERIOD-CR
	RTRUE	
?ELS13:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?GIVE \?ELS17
	EQUAL?	PRSI,ME \?ELS17
	CALL	PERFORM,V?TAKE,PRSO
	RTRUE	
?ELS17:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SHOW \?ELS21
	EQUAL?	PRSI,ME \?ELS21
	CALL	PERFORM,V?EXAMINE,PRSO
	RTRUE	
?ELS21:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?MOVE \?ELS25
	CALL	V-WALK-AROUND
	RSTACK	
?ELS25:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SEARCH \?ELS27
	CALL	V-INVENTORY
	RTRUE	
?ELS27:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EXAMINE \?ELS29
	ZERO?	GONE-APE /?ELS34
	PRINTR	"You've gone ape!"
?ELS34:	PRINTI	"You're wearing"
	FSET?	WHITE-SUIT,WORNBIT \?ELS42
	CALL	ARPRINT,WHITE-SUIT
	RSTACK	
?ELS42:	CALL	ARPRINT,GARMENT
	RSTACK	
?ELS29:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?MUNG,V?KILL \?ELS46
	CALL	JIGS-UP,STR?131
	RSTACK	
?ELS46:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?WHERE,V?FIND \?ELS48
	PRINTI	"You're in"
	CALL	TRPRINT,HERE
	RSTACK	
?ELS48:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?MEASURE \?ELS50
	PRINTR	"You don't measure up."
?ELS50:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?UNTIE \?ELS52
	ZERO?	BODY-TIED-TO-SLAB /?ELS52
	ZERO?	GONE-APE /?ELS59
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,YOUR-BODY
	RTRUE	
?ELS59:	CALL	YUKS
	RSTACK	
?ELS52:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TIE \?ELS64
	EQUAL?	PRSI,SECOND-SLAB,FIRST-SLAB \?ELS64
	ZERO?	BODY-TIED-TO-SLAB /?ELS71
	ZERO?	GONE-APE \?ELS71
	PRINTR	"You are!"
?ELS71:	PRINT	YOU-CANT
	PRINTR	"tie yourself down!"
?ELS64:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?FOLLOW \FALSE
	PRINTR	"Like most computers, I don't have legs."


	.FUNCT	GLOBAL-ROOM-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EXAMINE,V?LOOK-INSIDE,V?LOOK \?ELS5
	CALL	V-LOOK
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?WALK-TO,V?ENTER \?ELS7
	CALL	V-WALK-AROUND
	RSTACK	
?ELS7:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?DISEMBARK,V?EXIT,V?LEAVE \?ELS9
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?OUT
	RSTACK	
?ELS9:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SEARCH \?ELS11
	EQUAL?	HERE,EXIT-SHOP \?ELS16
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,DUST
	RTRUE	
?ELS16:	PRINT	NOTHING-NEW
	RTRUE	
?ELS11:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSI,GLOBAL-ROOM \FALSE
	EQUAL?	P-PRSA-WORD,W?THROW \?ELS27
	CALL	PERFORM,V?THROW,PRSO
	RTRUE	
?ELS27:	CALL	PERFORM,V?DROP,PRSO
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	HOUSE-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?BOARD,V?WALK-TO,V?ENTER \?ELS5
	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM,TEENSY-WEENSY-HOUSE /?THN11
	EQUAL?	HERE,LABORATORY,LOOKS-CAN-BE-DECEIVING \?ELS10
?THN11:	PRINT	LOOK-AROUND
	RTRUE	
?ELS10:	EQUAL?	HERE,FRONT-DOOR \?ELS14
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?NORTH
	RSTACK	
?ELS14:	EQUAL?	HERE,BACK-DOOR \?ELS16
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?SOUTH
	RSTACK	
?ELS16:	EQUAL?	HERE,CLEVELAND \?ELS18
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?NE
	RSTACK	
?ELS18:	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM,GARDEN \FALSE
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?WEST
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?DISEMBARK,V?LEAVE,V?EXIT \?ELS22
	EQUAL?	HERE,LABORATORY,BEDROOM \?ELS27
	PRINT	CANT-FROM-HERE
	RTRUE	
?ELS27:	EQUAL?	HERE,TEENSY-WEENSY-HOUSE,LABORATORY \?ELS29
	CALL	V-WALK-AROUND
	RSTACK	
?ELS29:	PRINT	LOOK-AROUND
	RTRUE	
?ELS22:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LOOK-INSIDE \?ELS33
	EQUAL?	HERE,FRONT-DOOR,BACK-DOOR,GARDEN \?ELS38
	PRINT	CANT-FROM-HERE
	RTRUE	
?ELS38:	CALL	V-LOOK
	RSTACK	
?ELS33:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SEARCH \FALSE
	PRINT	NOTHING-NEW
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	SIGN-F,NUM
	CALL	CANAL-LOC >NUM
	EQUAL?	HERE,CANAL \?ELS5
	EQUAL?	NUM,15 /?ELS5
	CALL	CANT-SEE,SIGN
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?READ \FALSE
	EQUAL?	HERE,END-OF-HALLWAY \?ELS14
	PRINTR	"""Up To Observation Room."""
?ELS14:	EQUAL?	HERE,OBSERVATION-ROOM \?ELS16
	PRINTR	"""Down to Cells."""
?ELS16:	EQUAL?	HERE,EXIT-SHOP \?ELS18
	PRINTI	"""E"
	PRINT	BOUGHT-AND-SOLD
	PRINTR	"."""
?ELS18:	EQUAL?	HERE,VIZICOMM-BOOTH \?ELS20
	PRINTR	"""Out of order."""
?ELS20:	EQUAL?	HERE,SOUTH-POLE \?ELS22
	PRINTR	"""Martian Orphanages, Inc.
   South Polar Branch"""
?ELS22:	EQUAL?	HERE,PENGUIN-PARK \?ELS24
	PRINTR	"""Give generously to the Penguin Retirement Fund."""
?ELS24:	EQUAL?	HERE,CANAL,WATTZ-UPP-DOCK \FALSE
	PRINTR	"The sign has no writing, only the skull and crossbones."


	.FUNCT	STAIRS-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLIMB-UP,V?CLIMB \?ELS5
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?UP
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLIMB-DOWN \?ELS7
	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM \?ELS12
	CALL	BEDROOM-EXIT-F,TRUE-VALUE
	ZERO?	STACK /TRUE
	CALL	GOTO,TEENSY-WEENSY-HOUSE
	RSTACK	
?ELS12:	CALL	DO-WALK,P?DOWN
	RSTACK	
?ELS7:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?THROW \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSI,STAIRS \FALSE
	CALL	WASTES
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	WINDOW-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LOOK-INSIDE \?ELS5
	EQUAL?	HERE,OBSERVATION-ROOM \?ELS10
	SET	'SEEN-EXAMINATION-ROOM,TRUE-VALUE
	PRINT	YOU-SEE
	PRINTI	" a large room below. "
	CALL	EXAMINATION-ROOM-DESC,TRUE-VALUE
	RSTACK	
?ELS10:	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM \?ELS12
	MOVE	FORD,HERE
	FSET?	HEADLIGHT,TRYTAKEBIT \?CND13
	MOVE	HEADLIGHT,HERE
?CND13:	MOVE	FORD,HERE
	PRINTI	"A car is parked on the street, twenty feet below. It's a Ford, a 1933 Ford ... and one of its "
	PRINTD	HEADLIGHT
	PRINTI	"s is "
	IN?	HEADLIGHT,HERE \?ELS18
	FSET?	HEADLIGHT,TRYTAKEBIT \?ELS18
	PRINTI	"loose"
	JUMP	?CND16
?ELS18:	PRINTI	"missing"
?CND16:	PRINT	PERIOD-CR
	RTRUE	
?ELS12:	EQUAL?	HERE,HOLD \?ELS24
	PRINT	YOU-SEE
	PRINTI	" Saturn and her ample rings."
	EQUAL?	SPACESHIP-SCENE-STATUS,1 /?CND25
	PRINTI	" Much closer, no more than a hundred feet away, is"
	CALL	APRINT,PASSENGER-SHIP
	PRINTI	". Judging by the steam blowing from her ion engines, she's preparing to depart."
?CND25:	CRLF	
	RTRUE	
?ELS24:	EQUAL?	HERE,JOES-BAR \?ELS29
	PRINTR	"It's raw and blowy outside. Little whirlpools of dust dance by."
?ELS29:	EQUAL?	HERE,SOUTH-POLE \?ELS31
	FSET?	ORPHANAGE-FOYER,TOUCHBIT \?ELS36
	PRINTR	"The window is fogged."
?ELS36:	SET	'COTTON-BALLS-SEEN,TRUE-VALUE
	MOVE	COTTON-BALLS,HERE
	PRINT	YOU-SEE
	PRINTI	" a "
	PRINTD	COTTON-BALLS
	PRINTR	" sitting in an entrance foyer."
?ELS31:	EQUAL?	HERE,ORPHANAGE-FOYER \?ELS40
	PRINT	YOU-SEE
	PRINTR	" an icy plain."
?ELS40:	EQUAL?	HERE,MAIN-HALL-OF-PALACE \FALSE
	PRINTR	"Colored light spills through the window."
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?OPEN \?ELS44
	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM \?ELS49
	PRINT	ALREADY-IS
	RTRUE	
?ELS49:	PRINTR	"It's not that kind of window."
?ELS44:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLOSE \?ELS53
	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM \?ELS58
	PRINTR	"It seems stuck."
?ELS58:	PRINT	ALREADY-IS
	RTRUE	
?ELS53:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT,V?PUT-THROUGH \?ELS62
	EQUAL?	PRSI,WINDOW \?ELS62
	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM \?ELS62
	EQUAL?	PRSO,HANDS \?ELS69
	PRINT	HUH
	RTRUE	
?ELS69:	IN?	PROTAGONIST,BED \?ELS71
	CALL	CANT-REACH,PRSI
	RSTACK	
?ELS71:	EQUAL?	PRSO,SHEET \?ELS73
	ZERO?	SHEET-HANGING \FALSE
	ZERO?	SHEET-TIED \FALSE
?ELS73:	REMOVE	PRSO
	CALL	PRONOUN
	PRINTI	" land"
	FSET?	PRSO,PLURALBIT /?CND80
	PRINTI	"s"
?CND80:	PRINTI	" on the street below. An urchin dashes up and runs off with"
	CALL	TRPRINT,PRSO
	RSTACK	
?ELS62:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?EMPTY-FROM \?ELS84
	EQUAL?	PRSI,WINDOW \?ELS84
	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM \?ELS84
	CALL	PERFORM,V?EMPTY,PRSO,WINDOW
	RTRUE	
?ELS84:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?DISEMBARK,V?EXIT,V?ENTER /?THN89
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LEAP-OFF \FALSE
?THN89:	EQUAL?	HERE,BEDROOM \?ELS95
	ZERO?	SHEET-HANGING /?ELS100
	CALL	PERFORM,V?CLIMB-DOWN,SHEET
	RTRUE	
?ELS100:	CALL	PLUMMET-TO-PAVEMENT
	RSTACK	
?ELS95:	EQUAL?	HERE,SOUTH-POLE,ORPHANAGE-FOYER \?ELS105
	PRINTR	"It's barred!"
?ELS105:	EQUAL?	HERE,OBSERVATION-ROOM \?ELS107
	CALL	DO-WALK,P?WEST
	RSTACK	
?ELS107:	CALL	DO-FIRST,STR?66,WINDOW
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	TREE-F
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLIMB-UP,V?CLIMB \FALSE
	PRINTR	"The trees are all unclimbable."


	.FUNCT	HOLE-F,OLD-HERE
	CALL	CIRCLE-ISNT-BLACK
	ZERO?	STACK \?ELS9
	EQUAL?	PRSO,HOLE \?ELS9
	GET	P-ADJW,0
	EQUAL?	STACK,A?WHITE /?THN6
?ELS9:	CALL	CIRCLE-ISNT-BLACK
	ZERO?	STACK \?ELS11
	EQUAL?	PRSI,HOLE \?ELS11
	GET	P-ADJW,1
	EQUAL?	STACK,A?WHITE /?THN6
?ELS11:	CALL	CIRCLE-ISNT-BLACK
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS13
	EQUAL?	PRSO,HOLE \?ELS13
	GET	P-ADJW,0
	EQUAL?	STACK,A?BLACK /?THN6
?ELS13:	CALL	CIRCLE-ISNT-BLACK
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS5
	EQUAL?	PRSI,HOLE \?ELS5
	GET	P-ADJW,1
	EQUAL?	STACK,A?BLACK \?ELS5
?THN6:	CALL	CANT-SEE,HOLE
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	CALL	HOLE-INVISIBLE
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS17
	CALL	CANT-SEE,HOLE
	RSTACK	
?ELS17:	EQUAL?	HERE,CELL \?ELS19
	CALL	NOUN-USED,W?HOLE,HOLE
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS19
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?WALK-TO,V?ENTER,V?BOARD /?THN22
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LOOK-INSIDE \?ELS19
?THN22:	CALL	DO-WALK,P?UP
	RSTACK	
?ELS19:	LOC	PROTAGONIST
	EQUAL?	STACK,CAGE,FIRST-SLAB,SECOND-SLAB \?ELS25
	CALL	TOUCHING?,HOLE
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS25
	CALL	CANT-REACH,HOLE
	RTRUE	
?ELS25:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?BOARD,V?ENTER,V?STAND-ON \?ELS29
	CALL	CIRCLE-ISNT-BLACK
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS32
	PRINT	NOTHING-HAPPENS
	RTRUE	
?ELS32:	IN?	PROTAGONIST,HERE /?CND30
	CALL	NOT-GOING-ANYWHERE
	RTRUE	
?CND30:	CALL	FALL-THROUGH-HOLE
	SET	'LONG-CORRIDOR-LOC,1
	SET	'MAD-SCIENTIST-COUNTER,0
	SET	'IMPATIENCE-COUNTER,0
	CALL	DEQUEUE,I-MAD-SCIENTIST
	SET	'OLD-HERE,HERE
	EQUAL?	HERE,LONG-CORRIDOR \?ELS37
	PRINTI	"Geronimo!
   Yow! You appear in midair, high above a canal-studded desertscape. The ground is approaching uncomfortably fast.
   Caw! Caw! A pterodactyl snatches you"
	CALL	AND-SIDEKICK
	PRINTI	" in midair and deposits you safely in"
	PRINT	ELLIPSIS
	FSET?	MY-KIND-OF-DOCK,TOUCHBIT \?ELS40
	RANDOM	100
	LESS?	60,STACK /?ELS40
	CALL	GOTO,MY-KIND-OF-DOCK
	JUMP	?CND35
?ELS40:	FSET?	OASIS,TOUCHBIT \?ELS44
	RANDOM	100
	LESS?	40,STACK /?ELS44
	CALL	GOTO,OASIS
	JUMP	?CND35
?ELS44:	CALL	GOTO,RUINED-CASTLE-2
	JUMP	?CND35
?ELS37:	GETP	HERE,P?HOLE-DESTINATION
	CALL	GOTO,STACK
?CND35:	EQUAL?	OLD-HERE,WELL-BOTTOM \TRUE
	IN?	SIDEKICK,WELL-BOTTOM \TRUE
	SET	'HOLE-MOVE,TRUE-VALUE
	CALL	SIDEKICK-FOLLOWS-YOU
	SET	'HOLE-MOVE,FALSE-VALUE
	RTRUE	
?ELS29:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TAKE,V?LOOK-UNDER \?ELS57
	PRINTR	"It's not liftable."
?ELS57:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT-ON,V?RUB,V?POUR \?ELS59
	CALL	NOUN-USED,W?STAIN,STAIN
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS59
	EQUAL?	PRSO,STAIN \?ELS59
	CALL	APPLY-STAIN,HOLE
	RSTACK	
?ELS59:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT-THROUGH,V?PUT-ON,V?PUT \?ELS63
	EQUAL?	PRSI,HOLE \?ELS63
	CALL	CIRCLE-ISNT-BLACK
	ZERO?	STACK /?ELS70
	CALL	WASTES
	RSTACK	
?ELS70:	EQUAL?	PRSO,SOD /FALSE
	EQUAL?	HERE,LONG-CORRIDOR \?ELS77
	REMOVE	PRSO
	JUMP	?CND75
?ELS77:	EQUAL?	PRSO,TORCH \?CND80
	EQUAL?	HERE,WELL-BOTTOM \?CND80
	CALL	TORCH-OFF
?CND80:	GETP	HERE,P?HOLE-DESTINATION
	MOVE	PRSO,STACK
?CND75:	CALL	NON-DIMENSIONAL-JOURNEY
	RSTACK	
?ELS63:	CALL	CIRCLE-ISNT-BLACK
	ZERO?	STACK \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TOUCH,V?REACH-IN \?ELS88
	PRINT	HAND-DWINDLES
	RTRUE	
?ELS88:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LOOK-INSIDE,V?EXAMINE \?ELS90
	PRINT	STARING-INTO-VOID
	RTRUE	
?ELS90:	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?MEASURE \FALSE
	CALL	PERFORM-PRSA,FLEXIBLE-HOLE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	HOLE-INVISIBLE
	EQUAL?	HERE,GARDEN \?ELS9
	FSET?	SOD,MUNGBIT \TRUE
?ELS9:	EQUAL?	HERE,CELL \?ELS11
	ZERO?	HOLE-OPEN /TRUE
?ELS11:	EQUAL?	HERE,LONG-CORRIDOR \FALSE
	EQUAL?	LONG-CORRIDOR-LOC,3 /FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	NON-DIMENSIONAL-JOURNEY
	PRINTI	"You get all cross-eyed trying to follow the non-dimensional journey of"
	CALL	TPRINT-PRSO
	PRINTI	" into"
	CALL	TPRINT,HOLE
	PRINTI	". When you get your eyeballs untangled again,"
	CALL	TPRINT-PRSO
	PRINTR	" is gone."


	.FUNCT	FALL-THROUGH-HOLE
	SET	'HOLE-MOVE,TRUE-VALUE
	SET	'RAFT-HELD,FALSE-VALUE
	PRINTI	"You're sucked into the hole in a direction that isn't down, but neither is it one of the other directions with which you're familiar."
	CALL	ULTIMATELY-IN?,WHITE-SUIT
	ZERO?	STACK /?CND1
	MOVE	WHITE-SUIT,AT-MAIN-HATCH
	FCLEAR	WHITE-SUIT,TOUCHBIT
	FCLEAR	WHITE-SUIT,WORNBIT
	CALL	VISIBLE?,WHITE-SUIT
	ZERO?	STACK /?CND1
	PRINTI	" Oddly, your "
	CALL	DPRINT,WHITE-SUIT
	PRINTI	" vanishes without a trace."
?CND1:	CRLF	
	CRLF	
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	TOUCHING?,THING
	EQUAL?	PRSO,THING \?ELS5
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TAKE,V?TOUCH,V?SHAKE /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLEAN,V?KISS,V?SWIM /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUSH,V?CLOSE,V?LOOK-UNDER /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?MOVE,V?OPEN,V?KNOCK /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?SET,V?SHAKE,V?RAISE /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?UNLOCK,V?LOCK,V?CLIMB-UP /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?CLIMB,V?CLIMB-DOWN,V?CLIMB-ON /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?BOARD,V?ENTER,V?ON /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?OFF,V?SET,V?THROW /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?TASTE,V?FUCK,V?RAPE /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?LOOK-INSIDE,V?STAND-ON,V?TIE /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?MUNG,V?KICK,V?KILL /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?KNOCK,V?CUT,V?WHIP /TRUE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?BITE,V?PUSH /TRUE
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSI,THING \FALSE
	EQUAL?	PRSA,V?PUT-ON,V?PUT,V?GIVE \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	IN-CATACOMBS
	EQUAL?	HERE,CATACOMBS,WELL-BOTTOM,LADDER-ROOM /TRUE
	EQUAL?	HERE,BURIAL-CHAMBER,FORGOTTEN-STOREHOUSE \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	IN-SPACE?
	EQUAL?	HERE,HOLD,STABLE,AT-MAIN-HATCH /TRUE
	EQUAL?	HERE,LONG-CORRIDOR,IN-SPACE,SPACE-YACHT \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	CANT-SEE,OBJ=0,STRING=0
	SET	'P-WON,FALSE-VALUE
	PRINT	YOU-CANT
	EQUAL?	OBJ,ODOR \?ELS3
	PRINTI	"smell"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	PRINTI	"see"
?CND1:	ZERO?	OBJ /?THN9
	ZERO?	OBJ /?CND6
	CALL	NAME?,OBJ
	ZERO?	STACK \?CND6
?THN9:	PRINTI	" any"
?CND6:	ZERO?	OBJ \?ELS15
	PRINTI	" "
	PRINT	STRING
	JUMP	?CND13
?ELS15:	EQUAL?	OBJ,PRSI \?ELS17
	CALL	PRSI-PRINT
	JUMP	?CND13
?ELS17:	CALL	PRSO-PRINT
?CND13:	PRINTI	" here."
	CRLF	
	CALL	STOP
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	CANT-VERB-A-PRSO,STRING
	PRINT	YOU-CANT
	PRINT	STRING
	CALL	APRINT,PRSO
	PRINTR	"!"


	.FUNCT	OPEN-YOUR-EYES
	FSET?	EYES,MUNGBIT \?ELS5
	CALL	DO-FIRST,STR?66,EYES
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	CALL	DO-FIRST,STR?133,EYES
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	NOW-TIED,OBJ
	PRINTI	"Okay,"
	CALL	TPRINT-PRSO
	PRINTI	" is now tied to"
	CALL	TRPRINT,OBJ
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	TELL-HIT-HEAD
	PRINTI	"You bang your bean against"
	CALL	TPRINT-PRSO
	PRINTR	" as you attempt this."


	.FUNCT	NOUN-USED,TEST-NOUN,OBJ
	EQUAL?	PRSO,OBJ \?ELS5
	GET	P-NAMW,0
	EQUAL?	STACK,TEST-NOUN /TRUE
?ELS5:	EQUAL?	PRSI,OBJ \FALSE
	GET	P-NAMW,1
	EQUAL?	STACK,TEST-NOUN \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	ADJ-USED,TEST-ADJ,?TMP1
	GET	P-ADJW,0 >?TMP1
	GET	P-ADJW,1
	EQUAL?	TEST-ADJ,?TMP1,STACK \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	OFF-VEHICLE?,OBJ
	EQUAL?	OBJ,STOOL,TOILET,FRONT-STOOP /TRUE
	EQUAL?	OBJ,FIRST-SLAB,SECOND-SLAB \FALSE
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	OPEN-CLOSED,OBJ
	FSET?	OBJ,OPENBIT \?ELS5
	PRINTI	"open"
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	PRINTI	"closed"
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	WEE
	SET	'AWAITING-REPLY,2
	CALL	QUEUE,I-REPLY,2
	PRINTR	"Wasn't that fun?"


	.FUNCT	IN-YOUR-PACKAGE,STRING
	PRINTI	"This is the "
	PRINT	STRING
	CALL	IN-PACKAGE
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	IN-PACKAGE
	PRINTI	" that came in your "
	PRINT	LGOP-CAPS
	PRINTI	" package."
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	HIS-HER,CAP-H=0
	ZERO?	CAP-H /?ELS3
	PRINTI	"H"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	PRINTI	"h"
?CND1:	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS11
	PRINTI	"is"
	RTRUE	
?ELS11:	PRINTI	"er"
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	HER-HIS,CAP-H=0
	ZERO?	CAP-H /?ELS3
	PRINTI	"H"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	PRINTI	"h"
?CND1:	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS11
	PRINTI	"er"
	RTRUE	
?ELS11:	PRINTI	"is"
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	HIM-HER
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS5
	PRINTI	"him"
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	PRINTI	"her"
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	HER-HIM
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS5
	PRINTI	"her"
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	PRINTI	"him"
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	HE-SHE,CAP=0
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS3
	ZERO?	CAP /?ELS7
	PRINTI	"H"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS7:	PRINTI	"h"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	ZERO?	CAP /?ELS15
	PRINTI	"Sh"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS15:	PRINTI	"sh"
?CND1:	PRINTI	"e"
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	SHE-HE,CAP=0
	ZERO?	MALE /?ELS3
	ZERO?	CAP /?ELS7
	PRINTI	"Sh"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS7:	PRINTI	"sh"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	ZERO?	CAP /?ELS15
	PRINTI	"H"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS15:	PRINTI	"h"
?CND1:	PRINTI	"e"
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	CANT-REACH,OBJ
	PRINT	YOU-CANT
	PRINTI	"reach"
	CALL	TPRINT,OBJ
	IN?	PROTAGONIST,HERE /?CND1
	PRINTI	" from"
	LOC	PROTAGONIST
	CALL	TPRINT,STACK
?CND1:	PRINT	PERIOD-CR
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	EAGERLY-ACCEPTS
	MOVE	PRSO,PRSI
	PRINTI	"Eagerly,"
	CALL	TPRINT-PRSI
	PRINTI	" accepts"
	CALL	TPRINT-PRSO
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	NOT-ON-GROUND,VEHICLE
	PRINTI	"But"
	CALL	TPRINT,VEHICLE
	PRINTR	" isn't on the ground!"


	.FUNCT	AND-SIDEKICK,NEW-SIDEKICK-LOC=0
	CALL	VISIBLE?,SIDEKICK
	ZERO?	STACK /FALSE
	ZERO?	NEW-SIDEKICK-LOC /?CND6
	MOVE	SIDEKICK,NEW-SIDEKICK-LOC
?CND6:	PRINTI	" and "
	CALL	DPRINT-SIDEKICK
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	PLAYER-CANT-SEE
	FSET?	EYES,MUNGBIT /?THN6
	EQUAL?	HAND-COVER,EYES \?ELS5
?THN6:	CALL	OPEN-YOUR-EYES
	RSTACK	
?ELS5:	ZERO?	LIT \FALSE
	PRINT	TOO-DARK
	CRLF	
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	DO-FIRST,STRING,OBJ=0
	PRINT	YOULL-HAVE-TO
	PRINT	STRING
	ZERO?	OBJ /?CND1
	CALL	TPRINT,OBJ
?CND1:	PRINTR	" first."


	.FUNCT	NOT-IN
	PRINTI	"But"
	CALL	TPRINT-PRSO
	PRINTI	" isn't "
	FSET?	PRSI,ACTORBIT \?ELS3
	PRINTI	"being held by"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	FSET?	PRSI,SURFACEBIT \?ELS5
	PRINTI	"on"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS5:	PRINTI	"in"
?CND1:	CALL	TRPRINT,PRSI
	RSTACK	


	.FUNCT	NO-LID
	PRINTI	"The "
	CALL	DPRINT,PRSO
	PRINTR	" has no lid."


	.FUNCT	SORE,STRING
	PRINTI	"You begin to get a sore "
	PRINT	STRING
	PRINT	PERIOD-CR
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	CANT-USE-THAT-WAY,STRING
	PRINTI	"["
	PRINT	YOU-CANT
	PRINTI	"use "
	PRINT	STRING
	PRINTR	" that way.]"


	.FUNCT	RECOGNIZE
	SET	'P-WON,FALSE-VALUE
	PRINTR	"[That sentence isn't one I recognize.]"


	.FUNCT	EXPLETIVE
	PRINTI	" ""Oh "
	ZERO?	NAUGHTY-LEVEL \?ELS3
	PRINTI	"shucks"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	EQUAL?	NAUGHTY-LEVEL,1 \?ELS5
	PRINTI	"damn"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS5:	PRINTI	"shit"
?CND1:	PRINTI	"! "
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	PRONOUN
	EQUAL?	PRSO,ME \?ELS5
	PRINTI	"You"
	RTRUE	
?ELS5:	FSET?	PRSO,PLURALBIT \?ELS7
	PRINTI	"They"
	RTRUE	
?ELS7:	FSET?	PRSO,FEMALEBIT \?ELS9
	PRINTI	"She"
	RTRUE	
?ELS9:	FSET?	PRSO,ACTORBIT \?ELS11
	PRINTI	"He"
	RTRUE	
?ELS11:	PRINTI	"It"
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	REFERRING,HIM-HER=0
	PRINTI	"I don't see wh"
	ZERO?	HIM-HER /?ELS3
	PRINTI	"o"
	JUMP	?CND1
?ELS3:	PRINTI	"at"
?CND1:	PRINTR	" you're referring to."


	.FUNCT	NO-ONE-HERE,STRING
	PRINTI	"There's no one here to "
	PRINT	STRING
	PRINT	PERIOD-CR
	RTRUE	


	.FUNCT	SEE-MANUAL,STRING
	PRINTI	"[You need quotes to "
	PRINT	STRING
	PRINTR	" See the instruction manual section entitled ""Communicating With Infocom's Interactive Fiction.""]"


	.FUNCT	UNIMPORTANT-THING-F
	PRINTR	"That's not important; leave it alone."

	.ENDI